11.12.2012

please pray...

458trust
on halloween night, my world was shaken. my mom came home from a doctor's appointment with the news that she had melanoma. we didn't know much except that she was to get to MD Anderson as soon as she could. 

it was out of left field. she had a spot appear on her face 2 years ago, and has been back to the dermatologist several times since, always with the same answer from the doctor, "it's not anything. we'll just keep watching it."

this past month, he actually was concerned enough to send her to the plastic surgeon to remove it since it was still growing, both doctors still not thinking it was anything. when she went to her post-op appointment on halloween for the plastic surgeon to look at it and give her the report, she was blindsided by his words, "it's not good news." he obviously, couldn't tell her much more than the diagnosis. turns out that it was so rare that the pathologist in tulsa had trouble diagnosing it so they sent it off to MD Anderson for diagnosis. 

the boys and i had been trick or treating with lane's parents and were literally walking out of the door to head to my mom's neighborhood to trick or treat with her when she pulled into their driveway. she said, "it's not good news." it took a bit for me to process it. 

between shock and me trying to hold it together for her and my kids, i was finally able to big, ugly cry once i called lane. poor guy had already been dealing with some heavy situations when i called him and could only get out, "my mom... my mom... my mom..." 

after my mom went to bed, i couldn't help myself...i got her report and got on google. bad idea. never a good idea! google didn't sound too promising. i called lane at 11:30 that night and literally cried for 20 minutes without saying anything. 

i had moved from the kitchen to the bathroom at one point. i had my head in my hands with my elbows on the bathroom counter when i looked up. through my tears, i laughed. literally 6 inches from my face was the plaque in the above picture. LOVE when god gives us reminders like that! 

the next 24 hours were just weird. i can't explain and had never experienced the feeling of waking up, and then having reality smack you in the face as i remembered what was going on. this happened a few times. i also had an instance where i was tickling knox's ribs with my mouth. he was laughing so hard. the first time i laughed. the second time i dissolved into tears. i could picture in my mind my mom doing that to me when i was a baby. i kept telling myself that i didn't want to live without my mom in my daily life. obviously, i was getting way ahead of myself!

after the shock of the situation started wearing off and plans were being made for Houston, we were able to think more rationally :) god instantly started meeting worries and concerns that my mom had. like big time. friends have already stepped up in big ways loving her. she has had a ROUGH 10 years. one medical issue after another, but has been a beautiful picture of grace and trust and strength through it all. she is fully reliant on god and her testimony has already spoken in big ways to others. 

this was her facebook post...
"Hey friends, I just wanted to ask for your prayers. I was just diagnosed on Halloween with melanoma and will be heading to MD Anderson Hospital in Houston on 11/13/12. They will be doing more surgery to check the margins and check to see if it is in the Lymph nodes. Although this is a little scary, we fully know that our GOD is good and that he is there with me and my family as we go through this. The JOY OF THE LORD IS MY STRENGTH!!! Thank you in advance for your sweet prayers. Much love to all of you, Laura"

see?!?! she's amazing. tomorrow is her first appointment. they are traveling to houston today my sister, lauren, is with her this week while the boys and i are in muskogee with my little sister, chloe. she was told to expect to stay for 2-3 days initially until they know what they're dealing with. we are just ready to know what we're dealing with so we can make a plan. 

thanks for praying for my sweet mama. we have faith that he can heal her fully. we also trust his plan for our lives. he's a good god. 

lastly, i've been praying psalm 27 for her since my father-in-law read that the night we found out. it's kind of perfect.

"The Lord is my light and my salvation
    whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
    of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked advance against me
    to devour[a] me,
it is my enemies and my foes
    who will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
    my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
    even then I will be confident.
One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.
For in the day of trouble
    he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
    and set me high upon a rock.
Then my head will be exalted
    above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
    I will sing and make music to the Lord.
Hear my voice when I call, Lord;
    be merciful to me and answer me.
My heart says of you, “Seek his face!
    Your face, Lord, I will seek.
Do not hide your face from me,
    do not turn your servant away in anger;
    you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
    God my Savior.
10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
    the Lord will receive me.
11 Teach me your way, Lord;
    lead me in a straight path
    because of my oppressors.
12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
    for false witnesses rise up against me,
    spouting malicious accusations.
13 I remain confident of this:
    I will see the goodness of the Lord
    in the land of the living.
14 Wait for the Lord;
    be strong and take heart
    and wait for the Lord."

4 comments:

Lyndi said...

i'm so sorry kelli. i cannot even begin to imagine what you're going through. i will be keeping your mama and your sweet family in our prayers! praying for peace, strength and a good report. XOXO

Meggie said...

Praying for your mom as well as the rest of your family! Praying for healing and peace!

Lauren & Eddie said...

Praying for you and for your mama. We found out on Thanksgiving two years ago that my mom had been diagnosed with breast cancer. It was so surreal and left me feeling completely helpless. I'll continue to lift you up!

Kyndal said...

Oh sweet Kelli, I'm so sorry to read this! Please know that I will be praying for your momma and for all of you as you support her during this time. So thankful that we can trust that our big God works all things for good! May He give you the strength and peace that you need in the coming days.